The Medieval Bestseller
I read it somewhere on the Internet...
Wednesday, October 24, 2007

I am just getting back from having dinner at Carrie's house. After dinner, Joey was playing some game on the PS3 and I was trying to do something on Carrie's computer, unsuccessfully. So I asked my brother to help me (I think it was to find the wifi connection, which mystifies me on PCs) and he gave me the controller and told me to play this game. Now I might possibly be the worst video game player ever, but I gave it a shot. People were laughing at me while playing the game and I didn't really understand why until I watched videos that Carrie surreptitiously shot on her camera of me playing the game. They are, in a word, hilarious. We'll have to figure out how to change the massive AVI files into manageable files you can upload on YouTube or something, because they need to be shared. I watched each of them at least five times tonight.

Um, so I don't find Anderson Cooper particularly good looking (especially on the third picture of that Wikipedia page--unflattering!), yet I kinda have a crush on him. I wonder what it is that makes him attractive to me. I mean I guess theoretically he's attractive, but he's really not my type at all. Actually, his look kinda reminds me of Powder. But I suppose maybe since I watch his 360 show on podcast, so maybe I find his smarts attractive. I just don't know. Maybe I just find him interesting.

Tonight I taught the Bible study at my church. Literally as I drove across town I lost most of my voice, which was extremely odd. The only thing I can think that caused it was that maybe it was the smoke outside (which doesn't seem that bad)...I think the smoke is also giving me massive headaches. In fact, I had a headache for most of today. But the voice thing, that was just weird. So I made myself a cup of tea at church and tried to talk loudly (but apparently I did not speak loud enough, as I heard one woman in the front row adjusting her hearing aid) and seemed to regain most of my voice back at the conclusion of the study.

I think the study went ok. It started at about 7:05 p.m. and at about 7:25 I looked at the clock and thought to myself, "Woah, I should slow down," because I was already through my first, second sections of the outline. Then I went back to teaching and then, after awhile glanced at the clock again and saw that it was now 7:35 and I had already cruised through most of my third section and I only had one section left. So, I went back to teaching and then looked at the clock a third time, since I was almost finished with my material, and saw that I made it (somehow) to 7:55, so that felt awesome. But then we actually went to like 8:05-8:10 because that's when people were pulling out the difficult questions to answer.

All-in-all, not bad. People seemed positive about how I did, but I'm not quite sure if that's just because they really like me or if it's because I did a good job. I always feel like I blunder a lot when speaking in public, but then people always tell me that I seem composed. How can I have such a different perception of myself than from what others observe? Mystifying. I hope I did ok...ever since teaching that Bible study in Jamaica, I've felt very insecure because I got such negative critique from the church members there. And the thing is that I know that their critique was very unjust and incorrect and may have even been misplaced, as they couldn't even recall who I was on the tenth (and last week) that I was there, but it still really affects my confidence in how I do things now, two years later with other internships and training under my belt. That internship certainly had more than its share of negative experiences. Anyway, I think it was good to teach tonight (the first time I've taught an adult Bible study since Jamaica) and get positive and reaffirming comments.

Susan did this meme the other day that I want to do, but it's too late now and I've already written too much. Maybe if I don't have much to say tomorrow, I'll do that. Tomorrow I'm subbing at the prep school again (although it's unclear to me whether I'm working in the office tomorrow or working in the classroom--either way I'm looking forward to it) and then in the evening I suppose I'm going to go see the Darwin Awards author speak at Caltech. I'm not a huge fan of the Darwin Awards (mostly I just think they're kinda dumb), but there's a group going from my old work, so I'm excited about that.

- Jenny, 10/24/2007 11:04:00 PM

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